Friday, 28 December 2012

Someone Like You Chapter 29

I heard my phone ring it was a7mad ..



I couldn't see anything or my room the image was all blurry my eyes were soakin wet tears were filling up my face ..



I pressed the green button ..







A7mad :"manal ? Shfeech ma trdeen?"

I cried ..

A7mad :"manal 5ala9 this has got to stop.."

Me :"I left him forever ..." With a crying voice.

A7mad :"oh .. Okai okai la tabcheen its okai manal ohwa hadich ana mara7 ahdich ... I promise"

Me :"ok"

A7mad :"manal .."

Me :"hmm?"

A7mad :"tathkreen lama 5ara3tich belvideo w 3a9abtay?"

I giggled while tearing and smiled.

Me :"yea"

A7mad :"wlk ana mo bss 67t ana met mn el'97ik shaklich yewanis w lama t3a9been yaboooy gomar"

I laughed.

Me :"hehehe"

A7mad :"I love ur laugh"

Me :"thank u"

A7mad :"t9adgeen manal sa3at mo kel shay elly tabeena y9eer .. And everything happenes for a reason you know?"

Me :"yea I know .. But it hurts ... So much a7mad U'll never understand how it feels to be replaced"

A7mad :"actually I do.. I once loved a girl and been replaced .."

Me :"9ij?"

A7mad :"yea .. Kent a3tbrha kel shay belnesba ly w mako shay e6lebta ma sawaita I gave her everything she wanted .. And..."

Me :"ee?"

A7mad :"and one day she left ... Just like that she blocked me w ana ma sawait shay ba3dain ektshaft enha t7ib thany she was just using me and I was a fool I believed her mn ma bedat a3amlha ka2anha maleka bedat t'3tar w malat mni 7abat thany '3airy she replaced me w el9ra7a mar shahar w la tshoofeen shakly I wasn't over her for months w mn ba3adha I never loved a girl ..."

me :"wow ... I'm sorry"

a7mad :"la 3adi things happen and I'm greatful for that cause she made me stronger .. and now I know how to pick and I'm more wiser ..."

I began to think.

me :"bss a7mad .. does that mean you'll never love again?"

a7mad :"la I will but I won't fall easily and I won't fall for anyone ... t3alamt halsha'3la"

me :"yea ... you're right .."

a7mad :"yea"

I never thought the pain in my chest would slowly go away .. I felt less pain when I shared my feelings with a7mad he always makes things better ...

me :"yea .. thank you for everything a7mad I feel really better I'm not crying anymore"

a7mad :"I'm glad manal wallah etha tabeen ay shay gooly ly I'm always here I'll always be here for you just know that I'm your friend"

me :"yea .. but why ? I mean why are you so nice to me and helping me?"

a7mad :"I don't know manal bss a7iss better lama akoon ma3ach w asa3dich I felt that way since the first time I saw you belavnuse w la7agtich cuz madri shloon bss kel ma atgarb mich I feel better so much better there's something about u idk shno bss its really effecting me .."

me :"hehe you followed all around avnuse?"

a7mad :"adri adri weird bss yea ..."

I smiled

me :"well I'm glad you did cuz If you didn't chan re7t feeha and you wouldn't have saved me from the car .."

a7mad :"true .."

we spent almost 2 hours talking on the phone.

a7mad :"lool manool its been 2 hours ... "

me :"ulla !!! wow mashallah ma 7asait belwagt"

a7mad :"haha wala ana ... oboy tawan nadany yabeeni eb sha'3la"

me :"5ala9 I'll talk to your later .."

a7mad :"oki"

me :"a7mad ..."

a7mad :"hala?"

me :"thank you"

a7mad :"dont thank me manal ma sawait shay w etha tabeen ay shay ana mawjood"

me :"enshallah"

a7mad :"yala bye"

me :"dont say bye .."

a7mad :"why?"

me :"I don't like goodbyes or the word bye .."

a7mad :"okay .. shno tabeeni agool ?"

me :"say .. talk to u later"

he laughed.

a7mad :"mn 3yooni talk to u later manal"

me :"see u"

he hang up and I layed in my bed ...

"sh9ar tawa? sh9ar ams w elyoom .. he made me feel better so much better its like nothing happened .. wow I never felt that way"


I stood up walked to my bathroom and I washed my face after crying I saw myself in the mirror I rememberd everything with jasim .. the pain in my chest came back.

"ahh no no no I want the pain to go for good gosh it hurts"

I went outside my bathroom with a sad face expression I walked slowly and went to the living room my mom and 5alood were there I sat with them and watched tv I wasn't paying attention to the TV at all I was just having flashbacks about me and jasim and the pain kept getting stronger.

I tried to watch a movie and endmajt for a while I felt less pain then mom told me ...

mom :"manal 7abeebti 3aysha called mesa3 galat entay ma trdeen 3alaiha tgool tabi t6la3 ma3ach elyoom"

me :"aaa .. yuma mally 5lg a6la3 elyoom kilsh"

mom :"liash 7abeebti shfeech?"

me :"la bss a7iss ta3bana"

mom :"ee ta3alay shfee wayhich elyoom w ams .. t7seen enich mara'9tay?

she came closer and held my head to check my tempreture.

me :"no mom ... bss a7iss shway ta3bana"

I wanted to tell my mom so bad ashky laha w tlmny bss I can't I can't ...

mom :"hmmmm 5ala9 kalmay 3aysha w gooly laha"

I went to my room and grabbed my phone I dialed 3aysha's number ..



it was ringing ...



3aysha :"aloo manool?"

me :"ee hala"

3aysha :"entay waaaaaaaaaaanich? 9ar ly sa3a adiz lich ma trdeen"

me :"umm I was busy"

3aysha :"waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaih .. gooly sh9ar I know that (ummmm) u say means something yala sh9ar manool?"

I closed my room door and sat in bed.

me :"... something happened  ..."

3aysha :"ee shno??"

me :"me and jasim ....... broke up"

3aysha :"WHAT? laish ma gelty ly ? sh9ar??"

me :"madri 3awash la ts2leeni tekfain"

3aysha :"enzain goolay laish sh9ar?"

I told 3aysha how his ex was back and he's back with her cuz I said I wanna be his friend and everything.

3aysha :"MOOO MN 9IJICH?"

me :"umm yea"

3aysha :"hatha jasoom? sawa che myyyy cousin"

me :"thats him .. yea"

3aysha :"la mo m9adga manool .. shloon ysawy chthy feech"

me :"lol 3awash 5ala9 I'm over him I left him for good ... I hate him"

3aysha :"ambiiii jad lal7een mo mestaw3ba .."

me :"me niether ... why would he do that to me why?"

I started to tear.

3aysha :"5ala9 ana aklma"

me :"don't ... i knew if I told u bitkalmeena w chthy w ana ma abeech tkalmeena 5ala9 ... its over .."

3aysha :"wow jad ma twa8a3t y9eer chthy ... oki manal elly yray7ich.. I'm so sorry"

me :"its oki .."

I spent all that day at home I wasn't in the mood to go out or talk to anyone its just so hard ..

sunday morning I woke up I wasn't feeling good at all I had to go to college I didn't want to ..

I saw my phone there was a text from a7mad..

a7mad :"good morning manool shloonich elyoom"

I smiled

me :"I'm living ;p"

a7mad :"3indy mofaja2a lich"

me :"shno?"

a7mad :"you'll see ;)"

me :"lool okai"

a7mad :"mota mo7a'6arich elyoom?"

me :"I'm with you with miss sona remember ;p?"

a7mad :"ooooooooooooooh 9a7 shfeeny mgafil looool ee elmohem tgdreen tyeen mbacher elkoleya?"

me :"why"?"

a7mad :"for the surprise ;p"

me :"hmmmm ... okay I'll dress and go out now"

a7mad :"okai txt me lama to9leen"

me :"okai"

I got up and got dressed to my blue jeans black top and black silver scarf around my neck I straightend my hair and wore black toms.

whenever I wear black alot it means that I'm sad its how I dress 3ala moody.

I got in the car early and told rajo to take me to college when I arrived there I texted a7mad.

me :"I'm here"

a7mad :"good come to the back garden"

I went to the back garden .. what was he up to whats the surprise?

I saw him from a dictance I came closer he was all smily and happy ..

I came closer to him he gave me his dimple smile and said

"9aba7 el5air"

me :"9aba7 elnoor"

a7mad :"haa shloon el7elwa elyoom" he took a look at me

a7mad :"yeeew aswad eb aswad thats a bad sign"

I laugehd.

me :"true"

a7mad :"tfa'9lay"

me :"oh .. thank u"

he took me to the tabel outside near the freshcut green grass ...

I saw a mccdonalds breakfast egg burger on the table ..

I laughed

a7mad :"shfeech"

me :"the other day when you said what do u like to eat for breakfast ... and u said u'll see hatha 8a9dik?"

a7mad :"ee"

he gave me a wink and a dimple smile ..

I laughed again.

me :"ur famous junk food right?"

a7mad :"6aab3aaaaaaaaaaan ma a9eer a7mad etha yebt junk food"

I laughed

a7mad :"3asa doom el'9a7ka .. you should laugh more often it brightens you up"

I smiled at him

a7mad :"yala lets eat'

we sat and eat our breakfast and talked till we had to go to our class ..

me :"ooohhh shit a7mad 2  mintues till class starts It's a long way .."

a7mad :"ne6ray ne6ray ma 5ala9t akly"

me :"GOOOOOOOOM"

I grabbed him.

a7mad :"a77777777777 shway shway"

I ran

a7mad :"manool shfeech mesta3yela .."

me :"a5af miss sona ma tda5lna!!"

a7mad :"malich sh'3il ra7 tda5lna don't worry .."

We rushed over to class miss sona she already closed the door..

Me :"ahhhh a7mad shoof 9akat elbaba !!"

A7mad :"manoool don't worry ne6ray"

He knocked the door .. And went in.

Miss sona :"yes a7mad? Why are u late?"

A7mad :" I had to take manal to the doctor she wasn't feeling good this morning she almost fainted.."

Miss sona :"Oh dear ... Is she alright?"

A7mad :"yes miss she's okai she's here with me now she only needed some food in her system"

Miss sona :"oh thank god well .. Come in come in both of u and have a seat"

A7mad winked and gave me a dimple smile and whispered :"a'9ab6ich"

I giggled

We took our seat and and stared at eachother laughing about what just happened.

When I finished all my classes I walked to the car while walking I thought I heard jasim's Voice .. I looked around but no one was there I kept on walking I heard his voice again I turned around but no one was there.

"Whats happening to me are you losing it manal? Just stay clam and don't think and ignore .."

I walked till I arrived to my car I went in and sat And tana7t ..

Rajo :"manal wain rooh?"

I wasn't paying attention.

Rajo :"manal???"

Me :"haa ?"

Rajo :"wain rooh?"

Me :"home rajo"

I was on my way home I arrived there Walked to my room and layed in my bed.

I placed my hand on my face..

"Its been 3 days since I lost him to that girl and it still hurts I'm wondering when will the pain go away ... Will it ever go away or stay forever"

I guess when I dreamt of having my fairytale I thought There will be a happily ever after ..

"What was I thinking wishing for a happily ever after .. It doesn't exist"

I put my headphones on and played "Invisible" by taylor swift.

She can't see the way your eyes light up when you smile

She'll never notice how you stop and stare whenever she walks by

And you can't see me wanting you the way you want her

I just wanna show you she don't even know you

She's never gonna love you like I want to

And you just see right through me

I sang along ..

I love it when I sing and listen to a song that explains exactly how I feel.

I took my clothes off and wore my PJ's and took a nap I woke up I saw an email from Jasim...

Wow what does he want ?

I opened it and read ..

"Manal .. Please come back I need you Ahal reem 6a7aw 3alaiha again and her brother Beated her hard and they took away from here everything .. I'm just so scared manal I don't know what to do or who to talk to wallah kalemoony ahalha whatsapp w ana gelt ra7 ahidha bss la tsawoon feeha shay ra7 awa5er 3anha manal I'm so sorry 3ala elly 9ar I trully am bss I need your help I'm begging you manal I know I made alot mistakes especially with you alot and I regret it al bss wallah I had no choice If I leave her tnt7er wallah .. And u told me 5ala9 go While I wanted to stay bss I had no choice Please manal please atrajaj when see this email kalmeeny ASAP!! Plz"














Omg ... He came back because she left wow but ...... he really looks like he needs help I don't know if I should talk to him and help him or ignore him.

I sent to a7mad.

Me :"a7mad guess what?"

A7mad :"what?"

I told him what jasim sent me.

A7mad :"manool la tkalmeena .. Na9ee7a mni"

Me :"bss a7mad he looked dispersed he needs help I won't be his gf again ever .. Bss he needs help .."

A7mad :"don't manal ... Don't do it la tkalmeena"

Me :"why not?"

A7mad :"t3arfeen shsawa feech .. Mala da3y akarer"

Me :"adri bss that dosen't mean I have a cold heart ana mo methla mara7 a3amla methel ma 3amalny I'm better than That I know"

A7mad :"I know too manal bss .."

I interrupted him.

Me :"bss its the right thing to do.."

I could sense that a7mad was very upset that I wanted to talk to him.

A7mad :"5ala9 elly yray7ich bs wallah etha sawa shay nafs ma sawah gabil ana ra7 akalma w mara7 a5aleech tkalmeena okay??"

Me :"okay .. And he won't"

I emailed jasim back.

"hey jasim I wonder why you came back to me now that reem left .. Lol ironic isn't it I'm always the second choice but thats not what I wanted to talk about.. I'm here to help you nothing more nothing less I won't treat you like you treated me I'll be here for you when you weren't here for me cause I'm a much better person and about reem I think you should stay away for a while 3alashan ma tzeed elmshakil w e9ber el9aber mfta7 elfataj ... And if you wanna talk Re-add me pin : *******"


I sent to a7mad :"done ... I also sent him if u wanna talk here's my pin.."

A7mad :"laaaaaaaaish why add him again?"

Me :"I didn't I only wanna help him.."

A7mad :"your not gonna add him :)"

Me :"says who?"

A7mad :"says me :)"

Me :"enzain shfeek m3a9b its my choice"

A7mad :"adri bss mara7 t'9eefena.. Don't manal just don't"

Me :"WHY NOT??? "

A7mad :"he'll hurt you again .."

Me :"I won't tell him about how I feel or talk about getting back together Bss ra7 asa3da eb shesawy then I'll delete him okay?"

A7mad :"okay .. Maybe he's up to something manal I just don't want you to get hurt"

Me :"don't worry a7mad wallah mara7 arid lah or anything I'm a big girl I can take care of myself.."

A7mad :"just be careful etha 9ar shay gooly ly 3ala6ool"

Me :"okay"

I saw a request from jasim.

I accepted.

Jasim :"manal???"

Me :"hala?"

Jasim :"THANK U THANK U sooooo much for Re-adding me"

Me :"I'm only here to help a friend nothing more.."

Jasim :"thank u"

Me :"np"

Jasim :"manal I've missed you so much wallah I never wanted to be with her bss I was forced cause she wanted to kill herself.."

Me :"jasim .. I don't wanna talk about this bss tell me sh9ar with her and I'll help you"

Jasim :"okay"

Jasim told me everything that happened with reem her family she got beatened up and hurt she has asthma and when she talked to him saying she'll leave him cause of her family but she didn't want to she couldn't breath and fainted on the floor.

From what he told me I understood the whole story she loves him so freaking much she sacrificed everything for him I understood why jasim stayed with her cause if he left her I think something bad will happen its all becoming clear now jasim isn't the bad guy well he was at first but then he put my feelings and reem's feelings above his.. he loved me so much and also he loved reem but not as much as me he stayed with her because he knew the consequences if he didn't stay with her after her parents family found out about them he received some threats he didn't want reem to get hurt and he didn't want me to get hurt too but I told him that its okai and I made it easier for him to be with her while he didn't want to at all he just stayed with her to protect her from her parents and from harming herself.

From this chapter I learned that The truth is always hidden sometimes you don't understand the actions of the person and you think they're just hurting u and playing with you while they're not they're just trying to protect you they hurt you for a while so you won't get hurt more in the future you can't judge a person by what he said or what he did sometimes words and actions are lies to hide the truth and the truth is to protect us.

-------------------------------------------

A Quick question to all my readers :-

- what do you think will happen with Manal and a7mad ?

Wednesday, 26 December 2012

Someone Like You Chapter 28

I fell asleep after crying so hard cause I've never been hurt that much from anyone besides my dad ..

I opened my eyes slowly and I found myself in that bed I slowly remembered what jasim told me I held my head Gosh It hurts so much .. I sat in bed with my head down a Tear streamed down my cheeks and in the floor..

I wiped my cheek and lifted my head up and took a deep breath and smiled then I wiped my smile away ... It hurts to smile it makes me wanna cry more I stood up gently I felt soo dizzy I had to face my family out there they were calling me..

I wore my shoe and calmed my hair and I got out that room I walked slowly to the living room where they all sit my aunts and cousin's and everyone.

While walking .. each step I took Felt heavy its like I was holding a weight and walking I didn't wanna face them or smile I can't smile I can't be strong I was soooo weak.

I entered the living room I only found my mom and my 2 aunts thats it .. I came in

5alty sara :"Halaaa manoooolaa el7elwa"

I smiled

Me :"hey 5alty sara" She opened her arm and hugged me.

I wanted to cry so bad at her chest but I held it I must be strong.

I sat there while they were talking and I didn't smile.

5alty najat :"manool shfeech mtan7a?"

Me :"haa?" i smiled

5alty looked at me

Me :"haha la 5alty bss tawny gayma mn elnoom.."

5alty najat :"bel3ther wayhich maskeen al7een hahahahaha" she laughed

I giggled and smiled and IT HURT ME SO MUCH.

Mom said :"ee 5oo benty nawama kela tnam madri shbefedha.."

"Ahh I don't wanna stay here"

I went outside to the garden .. And i sat belderofa ..

I looked at the sky it was 7 pm at night it was quite.

The pain in my chest wouldn't go away it hurts so much I want it to go away but It can't ...

I started thinking.

"it was my fault all of this wouldn't happen if I hadn't told him I wanted to be his friend It was my fault ..."

I blamed myself Then I got angry and en8ahart.

"Shloon jasim ysawy feeny chthy ma y7iss feeny? Wallah 7aram 3alaih galbi y3awrny abi yrd ly abi ygool tara ga3d at'3ashmar ma3ach now he's out there talking to that @$&£€ I hate him I HATE HIM!!! And I HATE HER"

I went to my BBM contacts and deleted jasim from my list ..

I started tearing so much and placed both hands in my face and wiped my tears away I needed someone so bad..

I logged in twitter I sent a DM to a7mad he was the first person who went through my mind.

Manool222 :
"A7mad?"

PK7amood :
"Hala manal?"

Manool222 :
"I ... "

PK7amood :
"Entay?"

Manool222 :
"My heart hurts so bad a7mad gooly shasawy? Help me please please"

PK7amood :
"Sh9ar laish?"

Manool222 :
"I can't tell you right now I'll cry w ana eb bait 5alty.."

PK7amood :
"Okai mota trdeen elbait?"

Manool222 :
"10 pm"

PK7amood :
"Lama trdeen elbait Gooly ly kel shay okay? La t5aleen shay eb galbich"

Manool222 :
"Okai.. Thank u"

PK7amood :
"No need manool yala al7een 7awlay tensain w estansay ma3a 3ayltich okai?"

Manool222 :
"Enshallah"

A7mad gave me hope and I went in and started watching tv with my family to forget it worked for a while and when it was 9:30 we had to go home ...

Mom drove and took us home me 5alood and 7amood.

When I arrived home I changed my clothes to PJ's and cleaned and layed in bed..

The pain in my chest was still there I DM'ed a7mad.

Manool222 :
"Hey?"

PK7amood :
"Your home?"

Manool222 :
"Yea"

PK7amood :
"Good now tell me shno elly 9ar?"

Manool222 :
"Lets talk somewhere ales here add me on BBM"

I gave him my pin and he added me.

A7mad :"manal?"

Me :"yea?"

A7mad :"ee kalmay?"

Me :"I ... Ummm"

A7mad :"entay shnooo??"

I couldn't hold it I started crying..

I didn't replay him.

A7mad :"manoooooool wanich???"

I didn't replay I layed in my bed crying so haaaaaard Like a baby ash'hag.

A7mad :"manal tekfain reday Are u crying??? Okay give me ur number NOW!!!!"

I held my phone And saw what he sent I wanted to give him my number but I don't at the same time I wanted to stop crying It hurts me so much wallah so much I had no choice maybe if he called me he'd make things better cause he always does.

I sent him :"90******" my number.










I heard my phone ring...

I pressed the green button










A7mad :"Aloo!"

I was silent I was tearing alot..

A7mad :"manal?? La tabcheen .. Gooly ly sh9ar?"

I started crying loudly he could hear me.

A7mad :"manal tekfain 3ashany stop crying please manal"

Me :"Wallah mo beedy" while I was crying

A7mad :"okai haday shway shway??"

I took a deep breath

A7mad :"now goolay sh9ar"

Me :"he loves someone ales ... More than me he's back with his ex"

A7mad :"shnoo?!! Mnoo??"

Me :"jasim"

I cried while saying his name Its hurts so much my chest hurts my mind hurts everything and everyone hurts.

A7mad :"okay okay haday shway shway manool okay?"

Me :"okai"

A7mad :"tell me what do u like to eat for breakfast?"

Me :"shno?"

A7mad :"ee shno?"

Me :"what .. Haa ... I like aaa .. Eggs"

A7mad :"okai good.."

Me :"why laish sa2altny?"

A7mad :"u'll see ;)" he laughed.

Me :"okai"

A7mad :"manoolty?"

Me :"yea?"

A7mad :"smile?"

Me :"I can't smile you think its easy .. I've been hurt by someone I thought was my life ... You just have no idea how I feel"

A7mad :"ur right manal I don't ... And I'm sorry 3ala elly 9ar.. Bss from what I see ohwa ma yestahlich 3ala kel elly sawaiteeh etha hatha rada wallah ma yeswa 9adgeeny ma yeswa yhdich 3ashanha wallah maynoon mo bss maynoon ella ma 3inda 3agel wa7da methlich y5aleeha troo7 mn eda sorry bss ohwa 7mar"

I was silent.

A7mad :"ahh sem3ay manal If he truly loves you chan ma sawa chthy wala rad 7ag his ex ..."

He was right

Me :"yea" I teared.

Me :"a7mad galbi y3awrny shasawy?"

A7mad :"relax breath and go wash ur face"

Me :"okay"

I went to the bathroom washed my face and took a deep breath.

I came back and held the phone to my ears..

Me :"done"

A7mad :"good now u wanna play a game?"

Me :"I'm really not in the mood .. "

A7mad :"7ayati?"

Me :"haaa????" I was surprised

A7mad :"gelt 7alalich"

Me :"hmmmm ... Okai"

That was not expected..

A7mad :"bacher wain bitroo7een?"

Me :"ummm madri mally 5lg aroo7 mokan"

A7mad tried to talk to me to make me feel better and actually in the end he did but When he was gone when he closed the phone I felt lonely and the pain came back bigger in my chest at 12 I slept that day with a heavy heart so much pain I couldn't handle ...

I woke up the other day friday With a sad face expression I didn't feel good at all I felt like everything was wrong I stood up came closer to my window and opened it it was sooo HOT the weather wasn't good at all I went to the bathroom washed my face and looked at myself in the mirror and teared ..

I wore my blue training suit and calmed my hair and went downstairs to watch tv again..

I sat there I decided to login twitter I saw in my Timeline reem and jasim they were indirecting tweets to eachother.

Reem :
"He's the best thing I ever had I'm so glad I'm back and he's mine.."

JasimAH9 :
"I love her so much I've missed her more than anything"

I hated it ... I HATE THIS I HATE THEM
I hate him I hate him I hate him ... How could he laaaaaaaaaish.

I squeezed my phone so hard that my hand was so red I kept scrolling down.

Reem :
"#10ThingsILove Him<3"

JasimAH9 :
"#10ThingsILove her <3"

They were killing me I can't stand this I'm slowly dying inside.

I decided I can't stay any longer I wanna leave him .. For good ..

So I wrote a goodbye DM to jasim That I can't be his friend anymore.

I sent a DM to jasim.

"Hey jasim I just wanted to say that I wish u luck and happiness for u both .. But as for me I can't stay anymore I wanna go I can't be your friend anymore it hurts if you had noticed I was in so much pain that my whole chest felt like it was burning I love you .. I loved you and I only said I wanted a break for a while in 2 days you replaced me do you know how that feels being replaced by someone you love so much? Its not easy not at all I spent the whole night crying for you and To be honest jasim I wish nothing but the best for you ma3a kel elly 9ar and if she makes you so happy then you deserve her But I won't be here anymore you need someone who's willing to give their heart and soul to you and promise you forever ...and Thats something I can't do anymore I wish I could say to you I will always stay with you but thats not me .. I can say I'd be all you need but jasim thats a lie I know I'd only hurt you I know I'd only make you cry ...I don't really wanna go but deep in my heart I know this is the kindest thing to do even though you hurt me I won't hurt you like that, You found her who is someone I could never be she may give you something better than The love you'll find with me I'm only doing this for u .. leaving someone when You love someone its the hardest thing to do when you love someone as much as I love you and I don't wanna leave you it tares me up inside I'm not the one you need I love you ...
Goodbye"

When I was done writing that I blocked jasim from twitter so he won't talk and I left I put my head in the pillow and cried so hard You can't imagine the pain I felt its like losing your heart its taring me apart inside so much ..

Gomt ash'hag while crying under the bed cover.

"please pain stop Please go away please go away ..." I said it while I was crying and my voice was almost gone.

I heard my phone vibrate.

I unlocked it it was a DM from reem.

Reem :
"Manal? Are you there? Shloon tsaween chthy 7ag jasim he's ur best friend shloon t'hdeena chthy w t76een lah block tadreen he's crying ga3d ygool ly its all his fault that u left and he wants you back.. don't you care about him if u did chan ma re7tay w hadaiteeh"


What?




She's kidding right!



I don't care about him?



She's has no idea I wish she would just shut up!!!


I replied to her DM.

Manool222 :
"Lol I don't care about him? I left for him even though I didn't want to it killed me to leave him I just wanted him to be happy I left for him so he'd be with you cause you make him happy ... Don't you tell me I don't care about him :) Everything I do is for him do u even know him ? Tell me whats his favorite color or what does he love to do the most ?? Haa?? Tell me"


Reem was silent for 7 minutes she didn't reply.

Then she wrote.

Reem :
"I know him :) okai and what u did was wrong just so u know just don't talk to him again:)"

She left and blocked me.







Wow! Really wow









I got so angry

"I HATE HER shtabi?? Mo kafy elly saweta feeny!!!!!"

I was so angry I screamed in my room and threw the pillow.

Someone BBM'ed me.

It was a7mad.

A7mad :"manal are you there"

I didn't answer him I was so angry and hurt..

suddenly I had flashbacks


3asyha :"hathy dala bent 5aly w hathy manal my best friend in the whole wide world"
jasim smiled and said :"tsharafna"




Jasim :"so manal 3arfeena 3ala nafsich"

Jasim :"mashallah ee wallah a7san mn banat al7een enshallah yakthroon amthalich"

I laughed shyly and said :"thank you"



jasim :"manal ... ana a7bich mn kel galby ... will you be my girlfriend?"

me :"yes yes yes <3"



We talked while on our way to el5airan I was sooo nervous that I'm going to see him.

Jasim :"close your eyes"

I laughed

jasim :"yala fet7ay 3yoonich now"

I slowly opened my eyes

me :"omg jasim mn 9ijik this is expensize why!!"

jasim :"el'3aly lel'3alyeen a7bich manal I dont care About the money low 3indy elfloos chan sharait lich the whole world ba3ad"


I looked at my bracelet the one he gave me and countiued rememrbring


Him :" i love u manoolty Forever"

Me :"w ana amoot feek jasoomy forever"


Jasim :"I love you Forever and always".

me :"forever and alway"

I started tearing ..

Jasim :"gomay .."

When I stood up he opened his arms and hugged me ..

I felt his warm chest and his touch I swear to god his touch has that magical thing that t5adrny and I feel so numb and wow ..

me :"wain benroo7?"

jasim :"ta3aly"

we went to a tree

he wrote J + M= Forever & Always






 I started crying ...

"I want him back he's mine I shouldn't let him go ..."

I held my phone and readded jasim ..

he accepted.

me :"jasim ?"

jasim :"manooooooooooooooooooooooooool .. laish troo7en chthy w sawaity block ma tadreen sh9ar feeny???"

me :"you have no idea what you did to me .. wallah :') I've never been hurt like that in my whole life ..."

jasim :"I'm so sorry I didn't mean to wallah u said 3adi w ga3da t'97keen with ur family and said friends I thought 3adi  3indich how am I supposed to know?"

me :"you should know that I freaking love you ma t7iss belly sawaita feeny????? wallah???? kel hatha ma 7asait I say I'm fine and left for u so you'd be happy why did you leave me for her while I didn't leave you for anyone ales.."

jasim :"what about a7mad haa?"

me :"I swear o8sim bellah I never did what you did I didn't tell him I love him or want to be with him w ma t3adait 7doodi  cause I love you I had you why would I want anyone ales bss lel2asaf you don't trust me w ana shasawit lik ? haa ma sawait lik ella kent m3ak w I listened to you and helped you  ... why jasim ? why ?"

jasim was silent..

me :"haa???:"

jasim :"I'm sorry manal ..."

me :"sorry? thats it ??"

jasim :"Idk what to say .."

me :"la tgool shay mabi ur sorry I wanted you ... you were mine not hers what cham 9ar lokom gabil?"

jasim :"4 months"

me :"you were with me 8 months thats double does she know you like I do? does she love you the way I love you? gooly bss 3awa'9tik b'3yaby ? are you happy with her "

jasim :"manal sem3ay .."

me :"just answer ?"

jasim :"no .. I'm not happy I hurt you and I hurt myself too how can I be happy when your gone .."

me :"3ayal laish hadaitny for her ????"

jasim :"you said we were friends ... and I knew it was cause of a7mad .."

me :"lol wallah ma tadri shay jasim you just have no freakin idea...  you don't"

jasim :"5ala9 manal I know you love me and I love you 5ala9 ahd'ha .."

me :"la2 don't ... stay with her ..
she deserves you more than I do ...


and I'm not a second choice to anyone


bye"


I cried my eyes off when I left and screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE MY LIFE !!!"

jasim sent alot of texts ..

jasim :"manal al7een bakalmha bahdha 5ala9 ... manal reday"

...

after 2 hours

he called me.

I had to pick up I was in a mess ..

me :"aloo" with a crying voice

jasim :"manal 7awalt akalmha w ahd'ha bss mo ra'9ya met3alga feeny ... gelt laha 5ala9 baroo7 ra7at elsa67 w galat wallah a8el nafsy mn foog etha hadaitny ... manal maynoona hathy sema3t 9oot elsa67 a5af tsaweeha .. w t6la3 elseba feeny manal ... I ... ma agdar ahdha I love you bss etha hadait'ha tnt7er tsaweeha ... w ahalha mo mtab3eenha oboha metwafy .. w messed up family.."

me :"jasim .. bss .. kafy I told u go ... I don't want you anymore la tkalmni wala tdiz ly ay shay 5ala9 its over ... for good I kept all my promises and I never broke one but you did and now I'm gonna break one promise .. another guy will have me .. someone who deserves me better than you ... bye"

I closed the phone and I cried again that was the worst day of my life

I heard my phone ring ..







it was a7mad ..




Tuesday, 25 December 2012

Someone Like You Chapter 27

I didn't know who to replay

"Agool 7ag jasim about a7mad being my lab partner ? Or no ...! I think I should"

I grabbed my phone and texted jasim.

Me :"jasim I have something to tell you w atmana enik ma t3a9b wala ta7kom .."

Jasim replied :"enshallah I won't golay?"

Me :" promise?"

Jasim :"I promise"

Me :"a7mad is now my lab partner .. Cause my other partner changed classes and the doc. Said i'll fail If I don't have a partner so he did me a favor.."

Jasim was silent for 2 minutes

Jasim :"w 6aba3an ohwa shafich me7taja a partner w raz wayha gal yabi y9eer ur partner 9a7"

Me :"he was just trying to help me .."

Jasim :"ee mashallah 3alaih bss yabi ysa3dich lool"

Me :"whats that supposed to mean :/?"

Jasim :"8a9dy tara neyeta akthar mn chthy ma yabi ysa3dich bss yabi mnich shay ...."

Me :"shyabi mny?"

Jasim :"ashkara yabeech"

Me :"what :/ he dosen't"

Jasim :"entay shdarach?"

Me :"madri bss ye7trmny as a friend"

Jasim :"great way to gain you ;)"

Me :"what :/!! Shfeek chthy"

Jasim :"entay elly shfeech m9adgta tara gam yel3ab 3alaich la t9adgeen kel shay"

Me :"he's just helping me with my college work bss madri laish mkaber elsalfa"

Jasim :"ana mkaber elsalfa :)? Entay a9lan hal2ayam mo mla7'6atny kilsh akalmich trdeen 3alai eb nafseya tara ana bss abi ma9la7tich .. Mabi shay thany"

I sat there in silence thinking.

Jasim :"shofay ana a7bich w mara7 a6lib mnich shay bss deery balich w kaifich w la tgoolen ana ma 7athartich .. Bye"

And he left like that leaving me wondering..

I was thinking
"Could jasim be right ? Is a7mad trying to gain me trying to take me .. No .. N .. No he wouldn't ! But maybe its true and how I'm treating jasim wasn't fair I feel stupid he's right I feel stupid I don't wanna be like this .. A7mad is my friend and he'll just be my friend I promise myself ... and I won't ever break it and If I do I won't trust myself or let anyone trust me ever again .. Thats a promise"

I layed in my bed thinking suddenly I received another DM from a7mad.

PK7amood :
"Manool are you there we have to discuss the project now cause 3indy sh'3il ba3dain"


Manool222 :
"Okay lets talk here .."


PK7amood :
"Bss 9a3ba hni"


Manool222 :
"Like it or not we'll talk here only .."

I was harsh on him cause I don't wanna get close to him anymore..

PK7amood :
"Umm ok"

And we started discussing our project and doing our papers for tomorrow when we were done.


PK7amood :
"Thats it .. We're done ^_^ so what do you wanna do now?"

Manool222 :
"I'm gonna do my other work so ttyl"

And I left I didn't wanna start a convo with him.

I worked on my college work did some papers and more When I was done I went downstairs and I saw 5alood and 7amood infront of the TV watching Cartoon Network our fav channel I sat there with them watching it too its been a while since i watched tv ..

We all ate some snacks I ate a jar of Nutella its my fav and relaxed I went up to my room I kinda missed talking to 3aysha I called her cell ..

It was ringing...

3aysha :"Alooo"

Me :"hey beautiful"

3aysha giggled :"hey gorgeous"

Me :"so whats up?"

3aysha :"not much really college stuff and whats up with you it almost 10 pm w entay ma tdgeen hal7aza ella etha shay 9ayer"

Me :"lool la bss I kinda missed talking to you"

3aysha :"awwwww 7ayaatii manoolty I missed talking to you tooooo .. So hows everything you know ..?"

Me :"ummm"

3aysha :"A2ooo when say that ummm shay kbeer 9ayer tell me.."

Me :"wallah madri 3awash .."

3aysha :"tell me !!!"

I told her what jasim said and how thingss went ..

3aysha :"wow! Do you think a7mad is ..?"

Me :"umm idk"

3aysha :"maybe jasim's right I think methel ma gelt lich la tgarbeen wayd yama .."

Me :"what am I supposed to do 3awash he's in my classes and my lab partner mo ma38ola a7gra I can't :/!"

3aysha :"yea your right I think you should tell a7mad about this and talk to him face to face.."

Me :"but I don't want to.."

3aysha :"then t7amlay elly bey9eer .."

Me :"fine .. I'll talk to him"

3aysha :"good"

We kept talking rill it was 11:30 pm and I had to sleep Cause I was really tired

The next morning I woke up at 9:30 am and I wore my blue and white top with black jeans and white sandals I made my hair straight and applied some soft make up, I took my bag and went outside to the car the weather was getting better it almost the end of september it was windy I went to college and It was almost time for lab before I went in I was holding my books walking down the hall ..

I saw a7mad walking towards me My heart started beating fast I noticed from a distance he made a new style saksoka I loved it it was really attractive he smiled from far away his amazing cute dimple smile and his eyes my gosh his eyes were sparkling when he came closer ..

I came back to reality ..

A7mad :"hey manal" he smiled at me.

Me :"hey .." I smiled back then wiped away my smile.

A7mad :"so are you ready for the project today.."

Me :"yea.."

A7mad :"good" he looked at the ground and noticed my sandals..

A7mad :"oh nice sandals.."

Me :"thanx"

A7mad kept staring at my sandals..

Me :"what?" I smiled.

A7mad :"looool" he laughed.

Me :"shnoo?"

A7mad :"this is gonna sound weird but I love your feet how they look"

I had that weird face expression..

Then I laughed hard.

Me :"LOOOOOL"

A7mad :"okay okay oush la t'97keen -.-"

Me :"LOOOOOOL yea it is weird that u like my feet LMAO"

we both laughed

I suddenly remembered I shouldn't talk to him much only about the project ..

Me :"ummm see u at lab class"

A7mad :"woooooh wait wain 6ayra?"

Me :"I have some stuff to do.."

A7mad :"mashallah kel yoom you have stuff to do.."

Me :"ee busy me" I smiled.

A7mad gave me his innocent dimple smile.

A7mad :"stay?"

Me :"sorry I can't yala bye"

I turned around.

I felt someone touch my hand.

I turned around at a7mad he held my hand.

A7mad :"manal ... Please stay!"

Me :"what are you doing?"

A7mad :"abeech tg3deen don't go.."

Me :"can u move your hand please?"

A7mad moved his hand.

A7mad :"okay"

Me :"see you later.."

A7mad gave me a sad face.

A7mad :"see you"

No more laughing and having fun with him ..

I left and lab class started me and a7mad went in

We sat the doctor kept talking and I could notice a7mad keeps staring at me Whenever I look at him he looks away..

Doctor :"alright everyone hand out your reports"

I stood up and a7mad came closer to me.

A7mad :"3a6eeny ana a36eeha"

Me :"la ana a36eeha"

A7mad :"may5alf 3a6eeny ana ba36eeha"

Me :"uff gelt lik ana ba36eeha"

A7mad :"w ana ga3da agoolich ana ba36eeha"

Me :"mani ma36tik"

A7mad :"5ala9 ana mani ma36eech"

Me :"ufffffff fine fine hak"

I gave him my papers I have no idea why we argued.

He smiled at me and winked.

Me :"I hate you :)"

A7mad :"I hate you too"

I laughed.

Me :"hahaha .. E7m chub chub just ahh bss eskit roo7 yala"

He went to the doctor and gave her our reports he came back smiling his dimple smile at me ..

I looked at him I seriously couldn't help but smile back His smile is so hypnotizing ..

We sat and listened to the doctor I got out of class a7mad came closer to me he looked like he wanted to talk.

A7mad :"manal?"

Me :"i have to go now a7mad elsayg na6erny"

A7mad :"wait wait .. Can we hang out tomorrow?"

Me :"no I can't sorry"

A7mad :"3ashany manool didn't we have fun last time?"

Me :"ee bs sorry It won't happen again yala bye"

A7mad :"manal tara fee shay 9ayer ? Etha fee gooly ly?"

Me :"mako shay 9ayer.."

A7mad :"don't lie to me .. Gooly"

Me :"Btw I know your game now.."

A7mad :"what game :/?"

Me :"I know your trying to gain me take me .."

A7mad :"what are you talking about?"

Me :"I have a BF a7mad I love him and you in the picture bet5areb kel shay .. You wanna steal me right yea I know your game now kela you wanna hang out w chthy"

A7mad :"wait wait mn wain 6al3 hal7achy mno gal lich a9lan?"

Me :"I figured it out myself" I lied cause jasim told me

A7mad :"awal shay I'm not trying to steal you gain you or elly gelteeh w thany shay ana ma sawait shay ella kent 6ayb ma3ach w at'3ashmar w laish sa3adtich a9lan w saved you cause I care I always cared bss w ma 6alabt mnich shay ella we hang out .. 5ala9 yuba tabeeni ma akalmich eb shay thany '3air eljam3a ? 5ala9 mara7 akalmich elly yray7ich ana basaweeh.."

Me :"yea ... Okay"

A7mad :"5ala9 I wont"

And I left .. I felt something in my heart .. It hurt me the words he said Even though I was finally free from the things he's been asking me for I felt Like I didn't want him to not talk to me.

I went home I felt soooooo down .. I decided to make up things with jasim so I called him I didn't call him in a long time..

It was ringing ..

Jasim :"hey"

Me :"hi"

His voiced kinda changed he sounded like was down at first but when I said hi he changed like he's happier.

Me :"shloonik jasim"

Jasim :"I'm good el7mdallah .. W entay?"

Me :"I'm good too damik good"

Jasim :"good"

He didn't talk much so I started talking.

Me :"so jasim ... You were right about what you said about a7mad and I told him what you said and wa3adny ma ykalmni '3air sh'3il eljam3a"

Jasim :"good I'm glad a7san wallah"

Me :"yea.."

Jasim :"I missed talking to you"

Me :"yea me too"

We kept talking normally and things were okay and better but still I didn't feel fully good about what I told and did to a7mad ofc jasim wouldn't care he'd be glad ena a7mad ra7.

We closed the phone and I didn't feel good after talking to jasim Sure I love him and all but something just wasn't right I can feel it ..

The next day I woke wore my skinny blue jeans yellow top and straightened my hair and pulled half of it back and I brought my bag and books went to my first class where a7mad is with me..

I saw a7mad inside ... I went in class and he stared at me and I stared at him ... I looked away he didn't do that dimple smile he always does its obvious he was upset I didn't smile either I sat infront almost the second raw and miss sona started talking.

Miss sona :"alright class today We're gonna hear some presentations about any subject you choose first we'll start with a7mad .."

A7mad stood up and went infront near miss sona ..

He held his papers and gave them to the miss he started talking ..

A7mad :"ummm hey everyone first of all I'll start off by talking about life ..


I learned in my experience life may not be as easy as we thought it would and it doesn't get easier we just grow and get stronger I learned that we do have a choice in life .. We can choose to do this or not No one can actually choose for us unless we let them .. we choose for our selfs the path we choose is in our hands .. Some people may take the easy road and some take the hard .. Either way what we choose is in our hands not anybody ales"

A7mad stared at me ..

A7mad :"and if we WANT something we have the choice to take it .."

He looked at me while saying that.

A7mad :"No one can control us and tell us what to do unless we let them and if we're not happy about something we have a choice to leave it or stay with it.."

A7mad looked at me while saying that too.

I started thinking about jasim ..

A7mad :"so in the end life and the path we're in .. is in our hands .. You always have a choice ... Thank you"

And a7mad sat in his seat ..

Miss sona :"wow a7mad that was very inspiring now dalal come up please"

I turned my face around and saw a7mad and he looked at me I stared at him and he nodded his head smiling I turned back to face the miss .. While dalal was talking .

I felt something inside me woke up By what a7mad said ... He's right I do have a choice why should I let anyone decide for me while I can decide for myself..

I went to my other classes I was pressured alot from college work a7mad hasn't talked to me all day..

I went home so tired and jasim texted me..

Me :"not now jasim I have alot of stuff to do"

I closed the phone and took a nap ..

When I woke up I had a huge headache ..

I went downstairs I took a panadol and ate some food ..

I went back to my room and held my phone I saw jasim leaving me a bunch of texts ..

"manal? are you there?"

"enzain at least reday 3alai?"

....................

I sent him :"jasim we need to talk"

jasim replied after 5 minutes :"yea?"

me :"I want a break .."

jasim :"shno ? sh8a9dich?"

me :"I want a break from us .."

jasim :"shnooooo???!!!"

me :"yea its just for a while le2any ma'9'3o6a mn eljam3a w ent w kel shay w a7iss abi wagt broo7y afaker"

jasim :"lool tfakreen wela 8a9dich 3an a7mad lol"

me :"lol wow ... is that your trust ? mashallah now I know how you trust me .. :) thanx alot"

jasim :"we're not gonna take a break mabi zain???:)"

me :"I need it jasim .. We'll be just friends okay? "

jasim :"you wanna break up ? what about your promise you're my wife you promised me ..."

me :"I'm not gonna leave you forever its just till I sort things out .. and I promise I won't let any other guy take me away from you we'll be just friends for now"

jasim :"mabi manool mabi ... Shno friends :/"

me :"please 3ashany .."

jasim :"lol is it cause of a7mad?"

actually the reason of it was a7mad the words he said made me think and wonder .. but I couldn't tell jasim about it or he'll think I love him or something ..

me :"no" I lied

jasim :"okay I'll give you some space and I'll be your fried if thats what you want bss ana mabi bs ..elly yray7ich"

me :"thank you"

I'm so glad he finally let me have a break and understood I really do have a choice.

I felt better actually for a while.

its been 2 days since me and jasim took a break and a7mad respected me and didn't talk to me.

after those too days it was thursday and I recived a text from jasim ..

jasim :"hey manal"

me :"hey.."

jasim :"I need to talk to you about something.."

me :"hala talk"

jasim :"reem .."

me :"what ?"

jasim :"my ex reem is back"

me :"what :\"

jasim :"yea ams kalematny w galat ena t7bny ahalha 6a7oo 3alaiha gabil w al7een radoo talephonha .. its been 1 year since I last talked to her and we left eachother 3ashanha w ahalha ..."

me :" ....."

jasim :"manal?"

me :"what?"

jasim :"i know 9adma bss elmohem akamel?"

Me :"okay"

Jasim :"I told her .. I miss her and love her too .."

Ouch he told her that?

Jasim :"and We're kinda back together now.."










HOLD UP!!









Back together?










What the hell?










How could he not tell me? About his past relationships .. 9adma wallah..

Jasim :"manal? You said we're friends now right? .."

Me :"yea .. But .."

Jasim :"yea so its cool right?"

A77 a77 a777 shloon ma y7iss WTF I told him abi break shwaya for a while and be friends and he found someone in 2 days his ex .. Oh my gosh

My heart burned .. I felt severe pain in my chest Its like a Knife went through and out of my heart and It won't stop bleeding A tear streamed down my face while I was silent holding the phone ..

I replied jasim :"umm yea its cool its ur life lol" It hurted me like hell.

I was in a total shock I was out in my aunts house at that time and everyonw was in the house I went outside for a walk ..

Suddenly I went in twitter and saw a New follower a girl called reem..

Reem :
"Please follow back"

I followed her and she sent a DM.

Reem :
"Hey your manal right?"

Manool222 :
"yea"

Reem :
"I'm reem jasim's ex .. And I just wanna say thank you sooooo much for letting us be together you're such a good friend to jasim.. Manal"

8aharny kalamha... 8haratny I wanted to kill her I wanna hit something ma y7soon belly ga3deen ysawoona feeny hatha 7abeebi ana w ehya tadri shloon chthy WHYY WHYY

I couldn't breath en8mat w ana atmasha belshare3 9adry 3awarny 7aail I started to tear bss maska bachyty OMG my chest hurts soooo much!!!

Its like something heavy in my heart at the same time it felt like liquid coming out down my chest .. Like its bleeding I couldn't bare with the pain ..

Manool222 :
"Np"

Jasim texted me :"kalemtich manol?"

Me :"yea.."

Jasim :"so its cool between me and you ? Friends <3"

Omg WOW WOW!!!

Me :"sure friends.."

Jasim :"a7iss met'9ayga.."

Met'9yga :)? Yoy have no idea how I feel.

Me :"la I'm actually with my family asolf w loya I'm laughing a9lan xDloool there funny"

Jasim :"u sure manool?"

Me :"yea positive now go have fun"

Abi y7iss shway abi y7iss belthanab ...

Jasim :"you have no idea how much this means to me manool I love you so so much your the best friend in the whole world I'll ttyl"

At that moment my heart stopped I couldn't help it but Cry I had to go inside my aunt's house but mabi ashoof a7ad so I went to the back door I ran to go to the clothes room it had a bed I layed in bed and cried my eyes off and held my chest..

"Laish ysawy feeny chthy?? Ma y7iss I only told him I want a break for just a while ma meda 2 days he found someone"

I cried hard and help my chest
"Laish galbi y3awrny chthy wala mara 3awarny chthy.."

And i cried and cried and cried so much till I fell asleep in that room..